We are not given a manual, and for many people, little to no information came from the adults around us or school sex education. Most of us had to pick up information wherever we could as we grew up.
Unfortunately, because sex isn’t a subject that people talk about naturally, easily, openly, and honestly, a lot of that information may likely have been misleading, inaccurate, and in some cases, an outright lie.
When it comes to sex, if we have problems or concerns, where do we go or who can we talk to? Finding helpful answers can be very difficult.
Most of the common problems that my clients present with, in my therapy room, are sorted out quite quickly and simply with some psychosexual education. The reason for that is that the sex education that most people received, if any at all, had a lot to do with how babies were made and very little to do with actually having, and enjoying sex. To receive the most pleasure from sex, we need to understand what desire is and how arousal works. We also need to understand the importance of intimacy, and exactly how our brain and our body manages all things sexual. We need to understand who we are as sexual beings, whom we are attracted to, what we want, and what we are not comfortable with.
We need straightforward, factual, information on the things we might worry about, like how we feel about our genitals, the content of our fantasies, why orgasms aren’t happening, and whether masturbation is healthy.